November 10th has become a significant day for me over the last few years. Three years ago I had pancreatic tumor removed as well as cancer they had found. I am super grateful that it was a huge success and I’ve been completely free of any cancer for the last three years.
I’ve been so complete around this experience that it carries so little energy but great lessons.
I do always remember a few things that even a difficult experience like this can give you.
For the first few days after my surgery I was in a shared large room with a few other patients. One of those patients was a very old man. His family and priest would gather around him in the evening praying as he laid in bed looking like he was in the last moments in his life. When I would wake up in the morning I would see him sitting up in a chair with his suit and fedora on. This happened for the few days that I shared the same room and will never forget that.
I will always remember getting my biopsy results a few weeks later and being told they had found cancer but how fortunate I was that I had a clean bill of health with no surgical complications and nothing else to do but recover. Walking out of my surgeons office and sitting in a bathroom stall for 10 minutes crying and letting go of all this energy from a few years of the unknown.
The recovery. Hands down the most challenging and painfulful 12 weeks of my life.
The physical pain, insomnia and emotional rollercoaster I will never forget.
The support. Truly grateful for my parents, sisters, family, friends, clients for being so supportive and understanding. For all the books, podcasts and playlists that distracted the pain and sleepless nights.
I’m super grateful for my health and for this experience. It was a great practice of spirit, failure and present to gratitude in a way I never experienced.
A Sunday Morning Playlist - Meditation / Gratitude / Faith (revisited)